Driving Desire

Be the driving desire of my life.

I wrote these words about five months ago:

“And so I embarked on a daily mission that has continued to this day: fervently, genuinely, boldly asking for a radically changed heart.

 Asking for freedom.

Asking for passion.

Asking for understanding.

 I am asking God to continue making it real for me. I am asking for a greater understanding of the real Gospel – the one that says It is finished.  The one that frees me from expectations, obligations, and the fear of my own failure. The one that is as radical as it is “real life.” The one that is so big and so life-changing and so extreme that I don’t think I ever should “come down from the high.”

 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. ~Romans 12:11

 What a commandment.

 I want my continual response to this unbelievable freedom to be endless Hallelujahs.

I don’t want to be “realistic” about how they are multiplied – I want to keep asking for more.”

I can’t say I’ve lived this way every second in the five months since. I’ve had my selfish, insecure, sinful moments. I’ve doubted His promises and been lacking in zeal.

But I can honestly say He hasn’t given up on granting my request. I’ve kept asking, and He responds even when I fight it. I’ve kept asking, and He’s surprised me, delighted me, and held me.

He has never been more real to me than in these past five months. I’ve never learned so much. I’ve never been so in love with Him. I’ve never been so free.

And yet I know there’s more. How glorious to know that I serve a God that never runs out. On this earth, I will never know enough of Him. I’ll never reach the limit of His love for me. I’ll never understand Him completely.

There is always more to ask for, and a constantly merciful, giving Father to answer me.  

It is just so exciting to think that of all the possibilities for the rest of my life, one thing I can be sure of: there will be more and more of God.

No place I would rather be,
No place I would rather be,

Than here in your Love.

Set a fire down in my soul

That I can’t contain and I can’t control

I want more of You, God. I want more of You.

I want more. Pour it out.

How good is it to think that the greatest good on this earth is never-ending? The only thing really worth having, the only thing that will bring any joy or fulfillment, comes from a never-ending supply.

Lord, set a fire down in my soul. Give me zeal and spiritual fervor. Be the driving desire of my life. God, I am going to keep asking. Because I know that you never disappoint. I will keep asking, because you always satisfy. I will keep asking, because I have learned not to doubt Your deliverance. I will keep asking for more and more and more, because I know You are always more than I can imagine or ask for. Lord, teach me how to share this. Give me the tools and the words I don’t have to reach a world so unaware of this never-ending well of your Love. God, I am asking for more of You. So much of You that it flows out of me. So much of You that I make them wonder about me. So much of You that I can’t help but speak, sing, and scream about it. Lord, break my heart for those that don’t know You. Break my heart for those that know of You, but don’t know You. Break my heart for those that aren’t asking for more. Give me a teachable spirit and a humble heart, Lord. Be the driving desire of my life, God.